Wednesday, January 27, 2010
What just happened?
Tonight I was feeding Madelyn her current favorite food (beside breast milk), carrots, and she looked up at me and I had a moment. There is no picture of this moment because I wouldn't dare stop feeding the girl, but let me describe the scene. She was sitting in her high chair (that's right she sits up on her own now and eats in a high chair) with a bib on. There were carrots all over her face and the bib. I am not that good at feeding her yet. Now my mom, my grandma and her aunt Paulette can feed her perfectly. I guess I just don't have the mom touch yet... Anyway, carrots, in case you forgot, are VERY orange. This crazy color just makes it all the more obvious. My little girl is growing up! The actual thought that went through my head was, "Who stole my little Madelyn and left this dirty big kid?" It just made me sad. Soon she will be like whatever mom and on to bigger and better things. I know new moms are usually anxious for their children to meet milestones. Rolling over, sitting up, eating baby food, crawling, walking, talking, eating real food and the list goes on. I just had a moment tonight when I genuinely wished she would stay this small forever. I didn't even care if it meant having to nurse her for the rest of my life. I just didn't want her to get big. In fact, I have taken probably three or four pictures of her sitting up on her own wanting to post it on the blog. But I really think part of me just didn't want to admit that she is doing that yet. I want my baby back! Now I know why moms always have baby fever when they are around them. I love all ages of a kids life (maybe minus years 12-15). Kids are hilarious! I am just not ready for a kid yet. I like my baby and want o keep her little. Any suggestions?